When you're in such a hurry you could just plotz...
The two-minute Haggadah. Yes, I'm a goy. But not a boring one. I have actually been to a seder, where one of the key roles was taken by a Catholic priest, lad name of Gelfenbein. His brother is a rabbi. So I can't vouch for how accurate this is, but it matches up pretty well with what I remember.
